Online Dating Profile Advice

Your Dating Profile – How To Present Yourself Online

2008-01-23T15:13:00.000-08:00

Your Dating Profile – How To Present Yourself OnlineBy Suzy Allen

For many people, the hardest part of starting to date online is
figuring out what to put in their profile. All dating sites
offer their members a profile page, where each member can write
about his or herself, upload a photo (or several) etc. What you
write about yourself in the profile is extremely important:
second only to the picture in terms of making other members
aware of who you are and making them want to contact you.

Many people are keen to start searching for and contacting
people as soon as they join a site. As a result, they either
leave their profile blank, or write something quickly before
beginning their search. This is OK if you’re just having a look
around, but if you are serious about finding love online, you
should take some time and make sure your profile is a good
reflection of who you are. After all, it’s what makes you stand
out from the rest of the people on the site.

Here are a few points to keep in mind:

Not too long, not too short

Try to write a profile that is detailed enough to tell people
about you, but short enough to leave people wanting more.
Writing a full length essay is a waste of time as most people
wouldn’t bother reading it all. If someone did read it through
and contacted you, you probably wouldn’t have anything left to
talk about!

Be yourself

It’s easy to lie when writing a profile, but more difficult to
follow through once you meet someone. If your profile says
you’re 6’4” when you’re really 5’11”, your cover will be blown
as soon as you turn up for your date. Also, starting a
relationship with a lie is a sure way to get off to a bad start.

Unfortunately, even people who are honest and well-meaning
sometimes lie unintentionally in their profile, by trying to
write it in a way that they think would make them more
attractive to other people. If you want to attract a likeminded
person, you have to be honest about who you are, your hobbies
and interests etc.

Don’t be too demanding

Many people use their profiles to list the qualities they would
like their ideal match to have. There is nothing wrong with
that, but make sure you balance this with information about
yourself. You don’t want to come across as writing a ransom
note.

Too much information

Avoid mentioning past disappointments and bad break-ups in your
profile; this is not what the space is for. Think: do you really
want this to be the first thing people see when they look you
up? Don’t let yourself be defined by negative aspects of your
personality and bad experiences of the past.

Make it funny

Using humour is a good way to liven up a profile and give
people a glimpse into your personality. Some of the most
successful profiles are the ones that simply make people laugh.
Including a joke you find funny is good, as long as you make
sure you write something about yourself in the profile as well.

Be original

Anyone can write “I have a good sense of humour”, but not
anyone could make you laugh. When writing about yourself, don’t
just use a list of adjectives. Try to go deeper and give people
examples of what you actually mean. A good way of doing this is
starting off with a list of adjectives and then using each one
as a starting point for a few lines of text.

Upload a picture

Even the least shallow people want to know who they’re talking
to. Not having a photo on your profile will make many people
ignore you completely. Some people even specify in their search
that they only want to speak to people whose picture appears on
the site. Don’t worry about your looks. Different people have
different tastes and not everyone expects to meet a movie star
or a supermodel online. A clear headshot of you smiling is all
it takes to seriously increase the amount of responses you get.

Be consistent

Make sure your profile, your screen name and your picture all
match the impression you want to give. If you are a woman
looking for a serious relationship, calling yourself “SexKitten”
and uploading a semi-nude picture of yourself, is not likely to
attract the kind of man you’re looking for. A man looking for a
wife, should probably not use a username that hints about how
good he is in bed.

Remember: your profile is the first (and often last) impression
you will make to potential online matches. Make it count.

About the Author: Suzy Allen works for Girls Date for free -
http://www.girlsdateforfree.com Dating and Chat

10 Tips For Your Online Dating Profile Picture

2008-01-09T12:34:00.000-08:00

What kind of picture should you use in your online dating profile? It's a question that torments many online daters, but the decisions that you make will greatly impact how well your profile performs.

Research shows that profiles with pictures perform infinitely better than profiles without pictures. In most cases, people will click on a picture they find interesting before they even read the online profile. Looks are an important part of attraction, there's just no way of getting around it.

Remember one thing. Most of us don't look like models. Different people have different tastes. It's safe to assume that most people looking for a mate aren't expecting to find a super model. They're hoping to find someone they find attractive, but most importantly they're looking to find someone they have common likes and interests with.

Now that we've gone over the importance of having a picture, grab a trusted friend and a digital camera and start taking some pictures. Here are 10 Tips to follow when picking out your picture, 5 good, and 5 not so good.

5 Rules to Follow:

Include a head shot of yourself. Make sure it is not cropped from another photo. The shot should be 100% focused on your face. Remember it's important to be honest in everything you put in your profile, and this includes your picture.

Use well-lit photos with a light background. Avoid dark pictures. The purpose of the picture is to highlight you and your appearance. Don't clutter the picture with other images which would pull the attention away from you.

Make sure to post multiple pictures of yourself. The more pictures you post, the better. If you have interests, post a picture of yourself doing the activity. If you have a pet, make sure to include 1 picture (and only 1, you don't want people thinking you're pet obsessed) of you with your pet. These pictures will help to tell the story of who you are.

Make sure to show a full body picture of yourself. If you have a body that you're not so proud of, you still need to take a photo that shows off your body. You can take it from some distance, but people what to have an idea of what your body looks like. If you have a great body that you like to show off, it never hurts to take a picture of yourself in a bathing suit. Research shows this pictures always get more clicks.

Smile, smile, smile!!!

5 Things Not to Do:

No pictures with an ex. The last thing a potential match wants to see is you snuggling with someone else. It's an instant turn off.

No lingerie or nudity. Unless you're at an adult site looking for a sex buddy, there's no reason to show yourself in a provocative pose. It sends off a message that your looking for another notch in your belt, not a long term relationship.

No group pictures. You may have the greatest friends in the world, but when someone is looking at your profile, they don't want to figure out which person you are among a group of people.

Don't show pictures of yourself out clubbing or partying. It gives the impression that you're only focused on partying and having a good time.

Don't use a picture that is blurred, darkened, or that appears to be hiding something in your physical appearance. Be honest and put yourself out there. Odds are if a person doesn't like the way you look in a picture, they most likely won't like the way you look in person. Save your self some time and aggravation and eliminate those people before you get involved with them.

Your picture is important, and remember to log into your account frequently. Most sites display the candidates that most recently logged in first, which means that the more often you log in, the more often your picture will be at the top of the profile list. The more exposure you get means the more opportunity you'll have to get noticed.

Jim McMenamin is the webmaster and creator of MacsDatingSite.com a blog dedicated to the various issues of online dating. For a limited time, Jim is giving away two free eBooks, 10 Tips To Writing Your Online Dating Profile as well as 101 Steps To A Happy Relationship, when you sign up for his newsletter.

Creating a Successful Online Dating Profile

2007-12-07T17:33:00.000-08:00

As the adage says, “You never have a second chance to make a first impression.” The way that somebody initially perceives you largely determines their future relationship with you. This is especially true when speaking of romance and dating; if you are not particularly intrigued or interested by the person you are speaking with, what reason do you really have for continuing your efforts? Conversely, a successful matching of personalities and interests can lead to stimulating conversation and future romantic possibilities.

When it comes to dating, then, it becomes vitally important to convey to adequately convey to the other party exactly what kind of person you are and what comprises you. However, doing this within the setting of a bar or nightclub is often easier said than done. It is difficult to demonstrate your wit and intelligence when you are screaming in the other person’s ear in order to be heard over the din. Additionally, the window to demonstrate exactly what kind of person you are is severely limited; as mentioned above, if one fails to grab the interest of the other party fairly quickly, the chances of starting anything meaningful with them become relatively slim.

With online dating profiles, the window of opportunity to convey your personality is markedly wider, and thus your chances of successfully doing so are higher. Think about it: You are free to write and create without worrying about external influences or pressures, and the other party is able to leisurely browse your information without having their senses bombarded from every side in a bar-type setting. The two parties are more likely to discover actual meaningful information about each other via online profiles than through hasty conversations at a bar.

What, then, constitutes a “successful” online profile? Several factors will determine whether somebody takes the time to read through your information. As mentioned above, it is important to attempt to convey the type of person that you are within your profile; the last thing that a person wants is to be unpleasantly surprised when future conversations reveal you to be nothing like your profile indicated. Tell of your interests and your passions. You may alienate some profile viewers, naturally, but the ones that take the time to read it are genuinely intrigued by you and thus more likely to take the next step and contact you.

As in life, intrigue remains an important component of romance. Try not to answer every question about yourself in the context of your online profile; you want the other person’s interest piqued, not sated. If somebody learns all there is to know about you in a three-page profile, they are less likely to feel compelled to communicate further. Conversely, a veiled question or some measure of intrigue in your profile may be just enough to spark an inquisitive email.

Finally, try to include a photograph of yourself in your online profile if possible. Physical attraction remains a vital component of dating online or off, and many people are leery of investing too much time in an online prospect without knowing what they look like. In fact, people will often filter out profiles without pictures when browsing online dating sites. Including a picture with your profile will ultimately increase its chances of success.

© Online Dating Tips Guide - Provides advice and tips about online dating.

Reasons To Sign Up With An Online Dating Site

2007-11-27T18:55:00.000-08:00

In the past, i.e. the 1990’s, online dating was a brand new idea. Unlike today, most people did not own PC’s or even have access to the internet. Times have changed. Online dating is not only IN the mainstream, it IS the mainstream.

There are many reasons for the phenomenal growth of online dating sites and the number of people, men and women of all ages, races and religions who use them as their primary source for meeting people and looking for “the one”.

If you don’t believe me, just ask your friends in the “real” world. If they are honest, most of them will tell you they have or are using an online dating service.

Here are three good reasons to sign up with an online dating site:

(1) You can be anonymous. You will never be required to give your real name, address, email address, phone number or place of employment to another online user. You, of course, may do so but only at your own discretion and only when you feel completely safe. You are not required to post a picture of yourself. Posting a picture, however, will get more responses to your profile. So you can surf through the other members on the dating site you have joined with complete anonymity.

(2) You have so many more choices online that you do in your brick and mortar world. Before the world of online dating came of age, the choice of friends and even of lifetime partners was limited to those we came in contact with through college or work. No more…the world is your oyster. You can go through hundreds…even thousands of profiles to find the right man for you.

(3) The “safety factor” is the biggest reason of all. An online dating service will never reveal your personal information. You get to choose who has that information and when they have it.

How To Choose The Right Online Dating Site

2007-11-13T18:30:00.000-08:00

With the explosion of online dating sites has come a virtual smorgasbord of choices. There are free sites… I don’t recommend those but if money is a real concern, they are better than nothing. There are the large paid sites with many and varied features like chat, IM and even matching using profiles. There are the less expensive paid sites with few features. There are special interest sites for almost any thing you can think of...outdoor enthusiasts, couch potatoes, religious, non-religious, gays, lesbians…like I said…almost anything you can think of. So what’s a girl to do? A girl should choose the site or sites that best fit her needs.

Here are some things to consider:
(1) Cost. How much do you want or how much can you spend each month for your membership (s)?

(2) Features. Which features are the most important to you?

(A) Profile matching systems. Is this a feature you really want or would you rather decide who is right for you all by yourself?

(B) Chat and IM’s? There are websites who offer chat rooms and IM’s on their sites. Does that matter or would you be happy just sticking to private email.

(C) Outside Events…such as speed dating? Are you interested in that?

(D) Privacy. Some websites allow you to limit who can view your picture or your profile. Does this matter to you or do you want as wide exposure as you can have?

(E) Safety. There are websites who do background checks of all subscribers and certify their age, marital status and background. Would you feel safer using this feature?

These are a few things but not all things you should consider when choosing an online dating service or services. Do your homework and choose wisely for the best results for you.

Online Dating For the Single 30 Something Woman

2007-11-01T18:57:00.000-07:00

Life isn’t fair. Men get all the breaks. You’ve devoted all of your 20’s to getting your career off the ground. Not that you haven’t been dating…you have, but not seriously. Now here you are…30 something and there is no long term relationship in sight. You can actually hear your biological clock ticking. You have a precious few years to find a man to fall in love with, make him fall in love with you, get married, and have a baby or its lights out. You already know all of the men in your social circle. Not that they aren’t nice guys…some of them…but none of them are your soul mate. What’s a girl to do?

Consider online dating. You have the opportunity to read hundreds of profiles and look at hundreds of pictures in search of that “someone” that will be right for you. Maybe he will live in the same city you do…maybe he will live across the country or even in another country altogether. You aren’t limited to only those men that you come in contact with personally. The possibilities are almost endless.

“Is online dating safe”, you ask. “Aren’t the online dating sites made up entirely of perverts, sexual predators and weirdoes in assorted shapes and sizes?” the answer is, no they aren’t. Not anymore anyway. That was true when online dating first came on the scene but now it is mainstream. It’s as safe as you make it using common sense and sound judgment. Use the same caution that you would when meeting any stranger. Don’t give your real name, address or phone number until you feel safe doing so. Don’t rush into a face-to-face meeting until you are confident and then make the first meeting in a public place and during daylight hours. Give it a try…Mr. Right might be a few mouse clicks away.

Online Dating Safety For Guys

2007-10-23T18:54:00.000-07:00

lmost everything you read about online dating safety is directed at women but men need to be concerned as well. Perverts, sexual predators and weirdoes come in both sexes, all sizes, and all ages…as do, liars and cheaters. So guys need to stay on guard, too.

It is common knowledge not to readily give out personal information to strangers. The reason for not doing so is as large as the number of strangers who want that information. If you come across a person who is giving out personal information and asking others to do the same, don’t do it. You don’t know what they want to use it for….and you had better believe they want to use it for something. That “something” will not be for your benefit. Men, also, need to guard their real names, addresses, phone numbers, and place of employment. Do not give that information to anyone online until you are confident that they are who they say they are.

Guys, be wary of women who seem too financially needy. If they ask for money, in any of a dozen ways women can ask for money, cut the relationship off immediately. They are not looking for love or even friendship….they are looking for financial help.

If a woman gives you a contact number but you cannot ever reach her at that number, beware. If you always have to page them or text them and have them call you back, this could be a sign that what they are telling you is not the complete truth.

A need to get married and insecurity are other signs men should be very wary of. If the woman is pushing too hard for a commitment you aren’t ready to make, it might be a good time to head for the nearest exit.

Writing Profile Tips For Men: Honesty Really is the Best Policy

2007-10-09T18:00:00.000-07:00

When you join an online dating service, you are looking for a girl that you can like…even come to love. That girl is looking for a guy that SHE can like or even love. What you aren’t looking for is a girl who would like your best friend or your idea of what the perfect guy looks like or talks like or thinks like. So, in order to find the right girl for you…and she IS out there…you need to be completely honest with yourself about yourself when writing the online profile, during the dating process and beyond.

The best way to begin writing your profile is to carefully analyze your past relationship (s). What was right? What was wrong? What things really made you like the last girl? Which didn’t? Don’t assume that just because you hated that your last girl was so totally self-involved that she couldn’t see anything else, you’ll be able to overlook that quality this time. You won’t.

If you aren’t 6’1” with a six-pack to be proud of, don’t claim to be. If you are a bar tender, don’t claim to be a lawyer with a six figure income. If you are 40 going on 50, don’t pretend to be 30 something.

Remember, the idea here is to find a girl who will like you exactly like you are. If you have lied in your profile, the first face-to-face meeting will remove all her doubt that you are a liar…and probably a cheat, as well.

Lastly, once you have found a girl that you believe can be the one for you, for goodness sakes, cancel your membership to the online dating service. After all, you know and she knows that online dating services are intended for those who are looking…not those who have found or been found.

Online Dating Profile Tips For Women

2007-10-04T13:36:00.000-07:00

OK…the time has come. You have joined an online dating service or two. Now you must write that all-important profile… the one that will attract attention and reel in the man of your dreams… but where to start? Maybe writing isn’t even something you think you do all that well. Even so, you can do this.

Here are some online dating profile tips for women:

The first thing is to be absolutely honest about yourself. You are looking for that man who will like…maybe someday love…YOU….THE REAL YOU! Examine past relationships and list the things that you liked and the things you did not like. If he smoked in the house and you hated it, you won’t like it any better the next time. If you love cats and will always want to own one or more, say that you are an animal lover and want indoor pets. Someone who hates cats or is allergic to them is not the guy for you.

Accent the things that make you unique. If you play the piano well, you really want Mr. Right to appreciate it. If you run in marathons, a couch potato is not a good match. If you love art, you really don’t want a man who thinks Picasso is an ice cream flavor.

Describe the things that are vital in your life. If volunteering is the one thing that makes you feel useful and worthwhile, you want someone who would, at the very least, support you if not join you in your volunteer projects. When you get beyond superficial things, you will attract men who share your values.

Invest in your online dating profile by hiring a professional photographer for your first online picture. This is so important. The picture is the FIRST thing men see. The second thing is that they read what you have written about yourself. Some online dating sites even provide you with a list of photographers in your area that specialize in online dating site photos.

Online Dating How To Stay Clear Of Married Men/Women

2007-10-02T19:19:00.000-07:00

Even in the offline world, you can’t trust some people to be who they say they are. But is the online dating scene even worse in attracting men and women who are married but secretly seeking others for extra-marital affairs?

While men are typically typecast as being the louts in this kind of arrangement, they’re not the only perpetrators. Some women are seeking partners at online dating sites as a security measure against being alone in between partners.

But for the most part, online dating site participants are genuine people who are single and seeking the perfect match for their love life. Most of the despicable people who are married and straying go to websites devoted to playing the field while taken, so there’s not as much danger encountering these individuals on a single online dating site.

Still, it could happen. If you don’t take precautions to get to know someone before taking things too far, then there maybe those who accuse you of playing a part in the adulterous relationship.

Don’t be willing to just accept someone’s profile as gospel. You need to get to know your online dating prospects before agreeing to meet with them or engage in any romantic relationships.

Sometimes, love moves more quickly on the ‘net, so you have to protect yourself against the possibility that the other party isn’t being completely up front about who they are or what they’re seeking.

You don’t want to be plagued by guilt and shame that ensues when you find out you’ve been the unwitting accomplice in a triangle of love with your online dating partner that the other person’s spouse knows nothing about.

If you discover someone you’re interested in has been playing the virtual field while still tied down to someone in the offline world, then you need to abruptly end the discussions and move on to someone who was more forthright in their disclosure of who they are and their marital status.

Some bloggers are taking adulterers who use online dating sites to task, accusing them of violating the unsuspecting party’s Constitutional Rights and making it more than just an ethical or moral dilemma.

Make sure you ask questions and notice anything unusual in the prospect’s demeanor. And most importantly, recognize that even if it happens to you, these people are in the minority, and don’t represent the majority of the online dating pool.

==> Search for that special someone

Online Dating Personality Profiles

2007-09-29T17:15:00.000-07:00

Some men and women get so intimidated reading other people’s online dating personality profiles that they can’t even make theirs live because fear is causing them to feel like they don’t live up to the rest of the online dating pool.

You might even have the guts to post your profile and then find yourself frustrated because when you give match-making a shot, others turn you down because you don’t live up to their demands, expectations, or desires right off the bat.

You almost have to have thick skin when you start posting your profile on online dating sites because it can sometimes cause people to be less sensitive than they would be if you’d met them in person.

Still, thousands of people are finding that one true love on the Internet, and it’s worth learning the ropes before you sign up at any dating site so that you’ll know the game before you go in and not get upset if you run into a few shallow people here and there.

You shouldn’t lower your expectations, but anyone who has a set list of demands before dating someone will surely find themselves disappointed. If you met Mr. or Mrs. Right on the street, you wouldn’t have a tip sheet of their profile to read before you said “hi” and discovered the spark underlying your conversations. Yet for some reason, some people reserve the right to refuse an online prospect if their list of characteristics isn’t checked off perfectly first.

Do you really want someone who has essential qualities in a mate, or is it preferable to find someone who is open to loving you exactly as you are? The dismissing process can be abrupt and blunt, so don’t let it hurt your feelings if someone says, “Thanks but no thanks” without giving you a shot. This is often only because people are joining dating sites to cater to their dilemma of limited time to spend searching for a mate.

Sometimes people put things in their profile list of Must-Haves that they don’t really mean. For instance, a man might add that his mates must look like a supermodel, when what he really means is he needs to have an attraction. It’s doubtful he’s been in the company of many supermodels, and surely he’s been attracted to ordinary women in his life!

In some ways, people believe online dating strips the first impressions away because you can’t see the subtleties that often attract us to our mates. But online dating gives you a chance to get to know the person’s personality and feel comfortable before you take the leap into real life dating.

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Tips on Writing an Online Dating Profile

2007-09-27T13:38:00.000-07:00

When you’re writing your profile for an online dating site, you may be one of the many who throws in a few false facts to try to spruce up the appeal of your profile to the men or women you’re targeting.

There are some things you should also leave out if you want to make a good first impression. It doesn’t mean you have to lie about who you are or what you believe, but sometimes it’s best to present yourself with your best foot forward in the beginning.

Here are some tips on writing an online dating profile:

First, try not to sound like a bitter, soured person who is already burnt out on the opposite sex. If you had a bad experience with your boyfriend, don’t sound like a man-basher in your profile. No man will want to take on someeone who has that much baggage following them around.

Negativity in general is a turn off for many people. If you hate the traffic, hate the weather, hate your job, and hate your life – what is there to like about you? The people you encounter on online dating sites don’t want a fixer-upper – they want someone compatible with their own personality.

Even if you’ve been plagued by bad first dates with other dating site members, don’t focus on what went wrong, but find the silver lining and talk about the details you did appreciate – even if it was just a learning experience.

Try to stand out from the crowd. Cookie cutter profiles are a turn off and if you don’t give the reader anything unique, how are they supposed to be impressed enough to choose you from the masses?

How many times have you read, “I love candlelight dinners and long walks on the beach?” Don’t be boring! Instead of candlelight dinners, be specific and say, “I love Mortini’s Italian Restaurant because the host always gives me the best seat in the house and their Alfredo Sauce is to die for!” This gives them insight into your personality, but it also lets them envision their first date with you.

To really spruce up a profile and take out everything a prospective partner doesn’t want, try to be specific about who you’re seeking in a mate. Make sure they know you’re flexible, if you are, but don’t just say, “I like a sense of humor” if what you really mean is, “I’m sarcastic and love someone who can give as good as they get with me.”

This helps remove the possibility that those you won’t be compatible will contact you and wind up being a waste of your time. Be sure to find people whose profiles you respect and emulate their success by substituting your own facts and outlook on life and soon, you’ll be seizing the opportunity to have a first encounter with someone new.

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